A Warning Label

"Oh, warning labels...it's as if they're daring you to do it. Sure, jumping a tricycle off a ramp into a kiddy pool might not be the best idea, but it is mathemmatically possible, right? A better idea may be to pound this bottle It won't help you stick that 720 tricycle tailwhip, but the vitamin D and calcium will help support strong bones. Plus, the vitamin C will help your body make collagen, which helps support joints. So when your pants split and you're laying face-down, relax comfortably knowing you at least got some additional nutrients...but we won't be able to easy the pain of the 618,052 online video hits." -On a Vitamin Water Bottle